Unleashing Love

Two years ago we prayed that God would show us how to unleash love. Our church was in an unleash love initiative. Teaching the church how to unleash love here there and everywhere. 

During this time, Chris and I got on our knees and prayed that we would have clarity and feel certain of what God wanted us to do. How he wanted us to commit financially, physically, mentally and spiritually to unleash love in our home, in our family and in our world. In those weeping moments on my knees when I was with my husband I heard the word HOME. When I heard that word I believed God was telling me that I needed to embrace Harford County and Mountain Christian as our home. And for the last 2 years we have committed to being here and to our family and life being here. 

However this summer we hit a lifetime low. Facing postpartum depression and health issues and tough toddler phases and being far from family, I began to question God as to why I still had such a strong desire to be home with family. I felt frustration that I still had the desire to be back home, yet family was still 2 hours away. 

We began to pray again and ask God what our family needed. What did we individually need and what our kids needed. Reexamining where you are in life is never easy. There are tears and hard conversations and frustration and confusion. Yet through it all, God revealed so much to us and lifted the fog and began to bring so much clarity and confidence in our future.

So while I believe that I needed to embrace that word, home, 2 years ago as accepting Harford county as home, I now believe that He was just preparing us for this next chapter. As we prepare to move home. To be near family. To bring our dreams to life. 

And as we have been pursuing these plans and this next chapter, our church entered into the same unleash love series. Focusing on how to unleash love in our world. And I believe without a doubt that this is what God has had planned for us all along. We are moving back home unleashing love in our hometown.

Sincerely, Loo

Becoming a Yogi

It was a Tuesday afternoon in July. I had hit a wall that morning. Like a big wall. I hit my lowest point and finally admitted that I was facing postpartum depression. I came home from some alone time and my amazing husband (who is oh so sweet and smart) suggested and encouraged that I try out a yoga class. A friend had been posting photos of her yoga journey and I had been making comments about how I thought I would enjoy it and I had been looking into local studios. 

So I went against every thought in my head and I put on my yoga pants and got in my car and drove to a yoga studio... what a terrifying moment for a super introvert who was depressed. 

some of my thoughts on my drive...

I’ve never done yoga before

I don’t know how to do yoga

Who will be there

Did I wear the right clothes

I don’t even have a mat

What if everyone is a professional yogi

Anyone else get super anxious when going to a new studio or gym? What a scary feeling.

 

Grayson and Finley were so excited to try out my mat when I got home. 

I thought to myself “I should just turn around” about a million times on my way there. But I somehow found the courage to walk into that studio, by my lonesome, introverted self, and I attended my first hot yoga class (of course finding a spot in the back of the room, by the wall). I cried, I sweat, I pushed myself, and I fell in love with the practice of yoga. 

I found something for myself. Something to look forward to. I remember the amazing teacher talking about finding your mantra, your “I am” statement. I remember repeating (in my head) over and over again for that entire hour and 15 minutes, “I am enough, I am a good mom”. 

Most of the classes that I have attended with this particular teacher have brought me to tears - emotional, overwhelmed tears - good tears. 

Yoga has become such an amazing outlet for me. It’s an escape, and a grounding place for me that brings me back to who I am and what I was created for. It’s a place of prayer and meditation for me.  I am so thankful for those encouraging words from my husband that day to just go. I still feel intimidated and anxious some days, and I am far from being 'good' at yoga, but I'm learning more and more that it's not something that you're good at. It's a way of breath and of life. I walk away feeling empowered and strong. I have come to love the practice and I am so excited for many more hours on my mat. 

Sincerley, Loo