Year 2

Two years ago on this day, I married my best friend.

It seems like just yesterday I was asking God... "when will I ever find my husband?"

I was single for 5 years.

At times, I lost hope. I didn't think I'd ever find "the one".

Everyone told me that I was "too picky"...

Through my single years, I was in many weddings, most of my friends were dating, engaged or married. I felt sad, hopeless, frustrated, lonely, even isolated at times. I clearly remember the nights when I would leave events, church services or friends houses and sit in my car crying out to God asking Him why I was still alone. 

My non verbalized thought process was plain and simple... go to college... meet a great guy... get married... follow him wherever he went... make babies... live happily ever after.

Well I watched this play out for most of my friends, but after college, I was still single, and then a few years passed, and I was still single. I was confused and felt so unsure of what I was going to do.

Then it hit me... like a bouquet smacking me in the face at a wedding... you know... because I was the girl who stood in the back with my hands behind my back during the bouquet toss...

I was so dependent on that being my story, that I wasn't open to the story that God had already written for me and my love life... He wanted me, my whole heart, my whole life.. He wanted my attention... and He got it!

I had hit such a low point of feeling sorry for myself, and pitying myself for still being single, that I had no where else to turn, than into His arms. 

In an old journal, with tear stains on the pages, I wrote that I'd never be able to find a man on earth who would love me the way that Jesus Christ loves me. The selfless, death bearing kind of love.

How crazy... God was waiting for me to realize the magnitude of His love. Finally, I clearly saw and felt that Jesus' love was way more than I was searching for in a boyfriend/fiance/husband. 

Nothing can compare to the way He loves me.

Did realizing this mean that being single was all of the sudden a walk in the park? Definitely not. 

But realizing it, helped in the moments of weakness when I felt like all hope was lost.

And then at the perfect time... when you least expect it, or even want it... God brings the man you've been waiting for into your life.

After God had captivated my heart... he brought Christopher Reese back into my life (we knew each other in high school). I was pretty certain he was NOT the one I had been waiting for... I was finally okay with being single, I was in a groove and he was not about to mess it up.

I told people he was not the one. I questioned him and his feelings.

However, after 2 months of earnestly seeking God's direction and listening to His voice,

He said yes, Chris is THE ONE!

Chris and I dated for 6 months...were engaged for 3...and we've now been married for 2 years!

Chris is my best friend and I am so thankful that I get to spend the rest of my life with him.

 But I am also so thankful for my single years with Jesus, that prepared and shaped me for this.

I realize more and more that I wasn't just waiting for the right guy... Jesus was waiting for me to love him the way I so desperately wanted to love a man... and because I learned to love Him the way He deserved, I believe that I am now able to love Chris the way that he deserves.

Happy Anniversary Christopher Reese, I love you!

Sincerely, Loo

Here's to another year of being married to my bestest friend...

Proverbs 31

I pray that God continues to reveal to me what it looks like to be clothed in strength and dignity. 

May we be women who are faithfully clothed [to endow with a particular quality] with strength and dignity. That when we encounter people, they are able to see strength and dignity overflowing. That our presence alone shows the power and worthiness of Jesus Christ Himself.

That fear of our future is dismissed, and that we live our lives with abounding faith , fearing nothing but the Lord.

Let me be a woman who speaks with wisdom, and pure intention. Laying aside my own agenda and remarks, being slow to speak, with a tame tongue. Let my words be God's words, and may they encourage others.

My prayer today is that I would live a Proverbs 31 life.

To be a passionately devoted woman, completely and loyally loving Jesus with my whole heart so that I may be able to love others with His love, the kind of love that only He can give.

I am human, I am imperfect, I struggle, but with his provision and guidance, I can live this life the way I am called to.

Sincerely, Loo

A Blessed Life

I am blessed.

I really am. 

Even though sometimes I feel like my life is spinning around me and I have no idea what I'm doing, where I'm going, what I need to get done, what I'm supposed to be accomplishing and chasing after... 

do you ever feel like you are wandering through your own life trying to figure out what's going on?

My life is kind of crazy right now... my husband and I are facing a lot of big decisions, challenges and changes. Which is good... it's just hard and very confusing.

I've been struggling with it all, like really struggling.

So, last night during a time of prayer at church, I was overcome with emotions.

I sat there with tears running down my face, thanking God for my husband. 

I have a man who is likeminded, who loves God more than I do. A man who challenges me and encourages me. He takes care of me, holds me tight and makes me feel safe. He makes me want to be a better person, and know God more deeply.

Sometimes when we are in the midst of hard times, it's easy to think that life is horrible, that there is no light at the end of the tunnel, that life will never be 'normal' again... (whatever normal is...?)

But no... we're in a season... although a rocky one... it's just a season.

And God has beautifully placed people in our lives to help us through it.

God believes in us, and He wants us to rely on Him for our strength.

I love my husband and I am so thankful for him.

I'm thankful that he reminds me to stay focused and continue seeking God through it all.

Sincerely, Loo

now the good stuff... here are some pics of my amazing, handsome hubby!

Bootcamp...

I want to be healthy... I really do. But I am NOT disciplined. It's hard. 

After working 8 hours, all I want to do is put on my sweatpants and cuddle with my husband while eating food that was cooked for me... yeah right! 

The reality is that 3 nights of the week, we are at church functions together, plus one other that Chris goes to without me. No one is here to cook us dinner. No one does our laundry, and no one cleans our house so that it looks nice for Thursday nights when we host small group.

So sometimes... I order food... most of the time, my floors are dirty... and laundry piles up...

Cuddling all evening with my hot husband... ISN'T REALITY.

And normally working out is the first thing to go from my evening schedule.

Also... am I the only one who forgets something every time I go to the grocery store? I swear they probably know my name, because I go all of the time! 

As a note... I'm okay with most of this. Because my husband and I always make time for each other, we are in great small groups through our church and love serving in our church! So for the most part... these sacrifices are well worth it!

Anyway... I tried something tonight.

My friend and coworker, Lisa (she's AMAZING), is in a Crossfit bootcamp and tonight was bring a friend night... I was the chosen victim friend.

OH MY GOSH! They're not joking when they call it bootcamp!

It was seriously hard... like I can't get off the ground...

somehow I survived it... and actually enjoyed it.

Here are some photos that they took during the class...

      

 

The team there is truly a family. They cheer each other on and support each other! It was so encouraging and inspiring to see so many women (and one man) who are all from different walks of life... with different stories... but all having the same goal of getting healthy and in shape TOGETHER! 

Team cheer at the end of the class!

Lisa is amazing... and did such an awesome job! She was SO encouraging to me (like usual)! She pushed herself... pushed me... and was also very patient with me when I thought I was going to be the first person to die during the bootcamp ;)

 

My consensus... I want to join Crossfit bootcamp.

Time to get healthy and do this for me!

Sincerely, Loo

The Path Home

Taken at my families farm in Maryland

The Path Home

The fear of losing my way overwhelms me. 

Since marrying my best friend almost 2 years ago, my idea of home has changed significantly. 

I lived in the tiny town of Sharpsburg, Maryland for 25 years. I know country, farm life, mountains, endless stars, rivers and creeks, family right around the corner. Life in Sharpsburg was easy and comfortable. I always felt at home.

In the last 2 years, we have lived in 5 different homes... my understanding of what home is is where the one I love is. My home is wherever my husband is. 

We live in Georgia now... 640 miles away from the small town of Sharpsburg. Where there are no mountains, star gazing is limited to a handful of stars and the sound of crickets at night has been replaced with speeding cars and sirens.

We have made Georgia home... we love our church, we have a great small group, we rent a charming little house, we both have great jobs, and we live 20 minutes from the beach.

However, over the past month I have been overcome with the thought of moving home... to Maryland. Closer to family... closer to the mountains... home. 

I have found myself in this rut of feeling bad about my situation.

Feeling unsatisfied with where I was so certain God led us just a year and a half ago.

I want to go home... 

Why this sudden change of heart? Why am I so anxious? 

Then, like a giant flashing light placed right in my path....

the home I need to go back to isn't my Maryland... I have wandered so far from my home in Jesus' heart that I must return! 

Not that long ago I was praying these words...

"Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders let me walk upon the waters wherever you would call me

take me deeper than my feet could ever wander and my faith will be made stronger in the presence of my savior"

Hillsong

May this song be my prayer once again. Wherever the Lord would take me... where I could never go on my own.

I don't just want to go home to Maryland, my heart is yearning to be home with Jesus. I have created this thought and feeling that living closer to my family would make me feel satisfied.

My path home though... it isn't 640 miles on 95 North... its getting down on my knees and asking the Lord God Almighty to embrace me and show me the plans He has for me and my family. 

Where do you find your home?

Sincerely, Loo

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